Hold On!

To anyone out there:

I hope you are doing better,
One step Closer to Recovery,
I wish there is something i could say,
To erase each and every page that you have been thru, the bad ones.

But, i wont listen to you giving up,
Just hold on for one more second,
IF you just hold on for one more second,
you will wake up tomorrow.

Hey, wake up wake up
You got to believe,
you got to wake up,
You got to stand still, to guard the ground,
time keeps going on without us.

Just hold on, and just hold on,
if you feel like letting go.

Life is pretty boring here after i finished my year 1 and left one year 2 sub. No more assignments, no coll, which is pretty bad for me becaus ei got nothing to do besides staying at home wathcing TV's program, online, eat, sleep....bla bla bla and the list go on.

I think i got the chnace to re-sit for the paper. Why is that, because i got a DI for assignment. YES, kinda relieve......Finished all the assignments, final's is one month away from today, plenty of time to play around.....college life, yeah, not bad. Finally!

first time!

Its a crisis today, feel the pressure, feel something really on me, presing hard on my shoulder, my heart beats fast, i felt nervous even after a few hours, sense of guiltytill now this time i am writting, still, its like hunting you, till you are goned....this is not a good feeling, its the very few times that i felt like this, how long i din feel this kind of pressure on me, perhaps its a time for chnage? to be more dedicated? or to be more hardworking? well i dont know man....

Know what i din go for my final examination for my marketing paper......its a disaster. I missed it, altho sickness could be a good reason to push things off, but still, i feel bad on this. Thi si the first time man...how could it be like this? It supposed to end last semester, but i brought it to next semester...man, how could it be.

No, prepared for the worst, hope the best...hope everything will turn up nicely for me in the end, the grant me for a re-sit, they accpet my reasons. And thanks for Kuan fong for helping me in this, i really bothers him today with all the call, but he still explained all the process to me patiently altho he is working. Really, thanks a lot.

Thats all for today's blog...man, i can really feel it this time.

*Speechless*

Dont know why, i am getting more and more secretive nowadays......is it because of certain things that happened on me over these few weeks? I dislike rumors, i dislike the people that cannt mind their own business, i dislike the strangers that talked about my stuff, its my business, not yours, please dun come into my life and please dun involved in my fucking private life. Anythign got to do with you? Man....

I leanred how to relief, i learned how to handle more things at once, i leanred how to keep the pressure away on me like wat i mentioned b4(the mandrin blog). Seriously, i've been affected by all the rumors that created by peoples, that i dislike, that i am not close with, i hate being in the focus light sometimes, especially the bad onces, i just hate it.

I learned how to be secretive, i learned how to keep more things private, how to hide something, not all the people will help you, please, dont be so pure untill you think everyone in this world is good till they will help you, or let you to relieve your steam, no way man. Choose, Choose those that you can trust. Dont ever ever reveal anything that you think its importan, especially the stuff that involved third parites..... , learned how to choose. Its the key.

Once again, wat am i talking you can ask me if you dont undertsand, but dun espect you can get clear answer from me cuz i might not be able to fullfill anything requirement.

Stubbornness

Is it good to be stubbron? There's no exact answer on this and it depends. Really, what make me say this?

There's no wrong to hold on something that you think its right, your principles, your theory. Why? Convince me to chnage my view on this :). If you can, please, go ahead and try. Of course, when you were exposed on something, definitely you will chnage your view on these "values". It dont have to be convinced.

But well, i do learn something recently. Letting go is one of the best way to not letting yourself down. A way to make you not suffer, a way to pass through all the hassle. Well, it really deprends.

What am i talking about? Do you understand? Well, if you dont, please try to ask me, but well, dont blame me on not giving you the answers because i dont really knows what i am talking about.

Ciaoz...